Reality Bites a ‘Villen by James A. Norton

I’m not saying he played poorly, but, the universal sign for choking just changed from someone with hands around their throat to a picture of
Peyton Manning….

So another Super Bowl has come and gone. Not much to say about the game itself, other than the debate will continue to rage on about Peyton Manning being one of the best all-time quarterbacks. I kind of wish he won, so that he could retire and go away. I’m not a fan.

The best part of the show, other than watching Seattle put on a football clinic (and Manning choke), was watching Bruno Mars and the Red Hot Chili Peppers put on a flawless half time performance. If you weren’t a fan of Bruno Mars before, you probably are now. Excellent show.

Then there were the commercials. Some of them were good, as expected, a few were awful – and some left me scratching my head wondering what they were thinking. There will most likely be some online debate over the Matrix-themed Kia spot, which I thought was clever until the singing began – and then it “jumped the shark” for my taste. Also controversial, in my opinion, was the Chrysler 200 spot starring Bob Dylan, which I enjoyed, even though it had the worst written line I have ever heard in a commercial – “Is there anything more American than America?” Really, Bob?

I was personally shocked at how funny the RadioShack ad was – poking fun at itself was just perfect for that relic of technology that somehow manages to hang on. Terry Crews didn’t disappoint in the Toyota commercial (the inclusion of Muppets notwithstanding), he always manages to cause laughs with his consistent brand of hilarious antics made infamous with his roles in the movie White Chicks and Old Spice commercials. That Audi ad with the “doberhuahua” was entertaining and not as silly as I thought it would be – probably the biggest surprise of all.

Then there were the disappointments – Doritos seemed out of place; Volkswagen’s engineer/angel’s wings theme was strange, at best; H&M’s blatant sexual objectification of David Beckham was a perfect time to get another beer; and speaking of drinking something, I didn’t care for any of the Budweiser/Bud Light commercials or the Coca-Cola spot at all. Don’t even get me started on the T-Mobile ad with Tim Tebow – the “no contract” part of it was a half-second giggle at best and probably the biggest waste of money of them all.

To finish out my summation of the Super Bowl commercials, the biggest let down for me was the Maserati Ghibli commercial – I’m a car guy and it’s an ad for a car – don’t wait until over a minute into the spot to even show the damned thing. What a waste – and on a car most of us can’t even buy – at least entertain us, not have us guessing what commercial we are watching until almost the very end.

So, as I wrote earlier, another Super Bowl has come and gone – and yet again, the best parts of it weren’t even the game itself. So sad. Then there’s the whole Philip Seymour Hoffman death by overdose – that’s a whole other column, for another day. #FOH

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